Day +60: Comforting Our Darling Friends

After comforting us through our ordeal with Sean and SCID, it was our turn to comfort Lissy and Dave.

Around lunchtime, Lissy texted me to find out if we were free for a catch up tonight. I eagerly invited her and Dave to have dinner with us, and they both accepted without hesitation.

My appointment to see my lovely dentist Dr Lee was at 8.30am, and we had planned a trip out to Costco for our big "stockpile" shopping. I headed off to Chatswood well before 8am, to ensure I arrived early and not miss my appointment. Even with the buffer, I parked outside Dr Lee's surgery at 8.25am.

Dr Lee greeted me very warmly when I walked in. It was nice to see Dr Lee again - it had been a while since I was last in his surgery. We talked for a while, and I caught him up to speed with everything that had happened with Sean. Dr Lee was already aware of some of the details, as my neighbour Jessie had given him some information. I referred Jessie to Dr Lee, and she was thrilled with his expertise, so she had been taking her whole family to see him. Dr Lee was given small updates whenever Jessie and her family had an appointment, but he was happy to get the special update from me, as he was always very keen on Sean.

Since Wednesday, my tooth had actually stopped hurting, so I felt a little bit embarrassed to be taking up Dr Lee's time. Dr Lee on the other hand was more than happy to do a thorough examination, including a couple of X-rays, to check if everything was fine. Dr Lee spotted a small infection in my tooth, and prescribed some mild antibiotics to get rid of the infection. My teeth was well overdue for a clean, so Dr Lee did that too, and I went home with a very clean set of choppers.

I had to pick up a few things from the supermarket on the way home, so I raced through Top Ryde Shopping Centre to collect the few things. We ate lunch before heading out to Costco for our big shopping trip.

And big it was. A full trolley later, we crammed all of our purchases into the boot of the car and headed home to start preparing dinner for our friends. I cooked up a huge batch of chicken and sweet corn soup for Lissy and Dave to take home, and set about making meatballs and dumplings for our dinner tonight.

Everything was ready by the time Lissy and Dave arrived. We all tucked into the food before conversation flowed. Neither Jonathan nor I knew what to say, so we waited for Lissy and Dave to talk to us, and listened when they did talk. They talked, and we listened, and offered as many words of comfort as we could. I even offered to help Lissy put all her baby things away, if she was up to facing the task. Jonathan took care of the bath and bed time routine while Lissy and Dave and I stayed chatting before clearing the dishes and moving to the couches.

We chatted long into the night, but no one looked at the clock. Lissy was more talkative and vocal, whereas Dave was reserved and withdrawn. Grief is a funny thing, and different people react differently. When everything with Sean happened, I wanted to talk and talk and talk, because that was how I coped with everything. Jonathan on the other hand didn't talk much, only talking when he was asked questions. Maybe it's a boy thing, to hold it in and compartmentalise it as best as he can.

Lissy and Dave showed us the memory book the hospital gave them. There were touching photos of Lucas with his parents, and his grandparents and aunties. He was tiny, but I expected him to be tiny. Lucas looked so peaceful, a perfect little angel.

There are plenty of things to organise, one of which is the funeral for Lucas that is likely to happen next Friday. A few other things have to happen before the funeral, and if anything is delayed, the funeral could be delayed as well. We have offered to help as much as we can, and Lissy promised to let us know which tasks needed our attention as soon as she sorted everything out.

I only wish I could hug Lissy and Dave all day and all night long, to show them how much they mean to us and to all of our friends, to suck the sadness out of them and leave them less sad, to fill them with light so they can see the end of this long dark tunnel. If only life was that simple. Life is so unfair sometimes.

Lissy and Dave, we love you so much. We are always here for you, and we are only a phone call and 20 minutes in the car away. Know that we are all in this with you.